Mother's Power Plays Undermine Severus: Rome's Gentle Dove or Duped Despot?

Salve, my fellow Romans,

Let's get one thing straight: every Roman mother-in-law has a reputation for pulling the strings behind the scenes, but none have managed quite the puppet show that we're witnessing with the dear old Mater of our own Emperor Severus.

Who needs the circus when we've got such a spectacle in the palace? Forget about bread and games, folks, this is the real deal. Here's the skinny on the maternal machinations pulling the strings of power in our great capital.

Severus, our own Emperor, should be in the driver's chariot. Instead, he's looking more like a hapless hapless horse being led along the Appian Way. And who's holding the reins, you ask? None other than Mama Severus.

Now I'm all about women getting a seat at the table - as a matter of fact, I am advocating for more inclusivity. But this is not the kind of power play we envisioned for our Roman society, folks. This is a maternal menace who's turning the imperial palace into a nursery.

Let's face it, the emperor's mother has never been the shy, retiring type. She's spun her webs in the palace since day one. But lately, her power plays are overshadowing our gentle Severus, and causing quite the political quagmire in our beloved Rome.

I mean, who's the real emperor here? Do we bow to Severus or to the woman who still wipes his nose? It's absurd to think that our emperor is being led around by the nose by a woman who probably still calls him by his baby name.

Don't get me wrong. I'm not against maternal influence. After all, it was Cornelia Africana who gave us the Gracchi Brothers, and, by Jupiter, they were some of Rome's finest reformers. But there's a difference between nurturing future leaders and literally leading from behind the throne.

This power play is not just undermining Severus, but it's making a laughing stock out of our great empire. We're Rome, not a puppet show. Our society demands an emperor who can stand on his own two Roman sandals.

So, to our dear Emperor Severus, I say this: it's time to cut the apron strings. You're the Emperor of Rome, not a boy under his mother's thumb. Stand tall, be the leader we need. Or else, we might as well start calling our empire the Maternity Ward of the Mediterranean.

And to all my fellow Romans, let this be a reminder that we need to advocate for leaders who can lead, not be led. Leaders who understand the importance of inclusivity, openness, and change. Because, after all, this is Rome, and we're not about to let a